Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Best of Times, Worst of Times...

Well on Monday was our middle sons 3rd birthday. It was simple but nice, way I like 'em LOL. He got a couple of stuffed Disney items he saw in the store and wanted and I made him a red velvet cake with a big number 3 written on it in sprinkles(green).
His uncle and aunt and cousins got him a Mickey Mouse see n say and a musical Little Einsteins toy...he loves them both.

Then Tuesday, life went to hell....
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Dan woke up shaking and barely able to walk or breathe. I felt he was warm so knew he had a fever but it didnt seem overly bad. He refused to go to the hospital or have me call his brother but he relented cuz he wanted me to let his brother know that he wouldnt be able to fix his car that day. But I, of course, told them what was going on and they said to call if I needed them.

Well around 630am I told Dan I was going to take a shower and if he was still off or had gotten worse I was calling his brother back and we were going in. He half nodded and I went and showered.

I was gone maybe 15 mins max and when I got back he was on fire and unable to open his eyes and just kept mumbling NO and WHY a lot. He wouldnt respond to me at all. I immediately grabbed the phone and ran to the bedroom to call his brother(didnt want the kids in a panic cuz they were up and running). I was panicked and near tears when I called and he said they would be out and on their way in under 5 mins.

So I paced for the next 30 mins or thereabouts(his brother lives about 20 mins away on the other side of town and with rush hour traffic took a bit longer than usual). Dan wouldnt open his eyes just kept mumbling NO and WHY and when I talked to him he called me MOM. He then proceeded to call me MOM(should note his mom died 11 yrs ago) and when I said she wasnt here he got into a conversation with me in the midst of his delirium. He asked where she was and I said HEAVEN. He said no she wasnt and I said ok where is she then and he said she was right next to him holding his hand and he moved his hand out reaching and grasping "hers".

Of course, I freaked because when very sick people see dead relatives its not usually a good sign.

He kept mumbling for a bit and when Id talk he kept calling me mom but I had to keep him going so I knew he was still breathing,etc.

At one point(and from this point on I might get the order a bit mixed up but not what he said and did) he called for his mother and I said, again, she wasnt here. He said she was and I asked where and he said the kitchen. He was with her and she told him he couldnt go with her, that he had to stay here. Imagine the thoughts running through my head at this point and me trying to keep it all together cuz the boys are running around not sure whats up(I was crying a bit though just not as hysterically as I wanted to LOL).

He then called over Connor and gave him a big hug and said he loved him very very much. Then Avery and then Devinn. When I handed him Devinn he grabbed him and said "my sweet, sweet Devinn" He's NEVER EVER EVER used those terms in our 7 yrs together.

I should note, he did all of this talking with his eyes closed. When calling for his mom or asking Why or saying NO he had tears streaming down his face but eyes were closed.

Anyway, back to the conversation. He then said Hillarie and I said "yes love" and he said I love you very very much. And then proceeded to tell me he was Susan(Dans mother) and that I wasnt to go to the hospital with him because it was a butcher shop and if he went he'd catch some kind of infection and die. That he needed aspirin and ice and he'd be fine. Then she/he made me promise to not take him to the hospital. I said I couldnt promise that because I was scared but Id try. I also said Robert was coming. He/she said Roberts coming? and I said yes he will be here soon and he/she said Robert will know what to do. "Susan" kept telling me that its happened to Dan before and Robert would know what to do. No hospital!

"Susan" said she could not see the future nor past just the here and now(dont know why it was said). Said he(Dan) would be alright.

I said well do you have a message for Robert and she said to tell him she loved him, always had and that she was sorry and never meant to hurt him(she disowned him over some hurtful actions on his part) and that she was always with him. I asked if she was watching over my boys and she said always. I should note that she, at this point, told me she had to go cuz it was too much of a strain on Dan to stay there. I said why not wait til Robert was here and then he pulled up.

Then Robert and his wife showed up. I told them what he had said when talking as if Susan. They were a little bit ummmm unnerved by it but blew it off and went to work helping me cool him down. Right after they showed up tho he grabbed Robert and told him what Susan had wanted me to tell him(said it as if still Susan I should say).

I have to tell you, while talking as Susan I had a sense of peace come over me and the panic and fear left. Why, I dont know but it did. So Im grateful for that delirious ummm "take over". I know most wont believe she was really here but I do. Things were said that I never knew(like him going through this before) and the way she talked to the boys isnt Dans normal thing.

I know being delirious can cause a lot of funny things to be done and said but I do think his mom was here. When your mind is so fried I think you can connect to the other side...but thats just me and I realize there is skepticism.

By 10am, after a cold bath and water being dumped on him and a period of fever down then spiking and him thinking it was 1993...he finally broke the fever.

He feels like he's been run over by 100 trains LOL but the fever is gone and he's back with us(so to speak). He has NO memory of the events between going to bed the night before and waking up in a tub full of cold water.

Robert said he doesnt need to know any of the stuff that went on during his feverish time so Ive not told him anymore than mumbling Why and NO and I promised he never said anything hurtful(which he didnt).

So that was my day. It was all done by 11am. He had a normal temp and was in and out of sleep the rest of the day.

Today, he's still feeling crappy and sleeping off and on. Im just glad the temp is gone even if a bit of the crud remains. His body went through a lot yesterday....he needs to rest!

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